“Before you assume, learn the facts. Before you judge, understand why. Before you hurt someone, feel. Before you speak, think.” – Anonymous
A 22-year old boy along with his mother were travelling in a train. The boy became thrilled upon seeing a bird flying and trees zooming as the train passed them. He pointed it all out to his mother with such zeal. The onlookers watched his strange behavior with an even more strange an expression.
One of the passengers upon approaching his mother advised her to get her son to a Doctor for his brain check-up for which 22-year old would get elated the prospect of seeing the normalities of life?
Is the passenger correct in his opinion? Maybe. But it is also possible that he is jumping to a false conclusion.
The mother replied that they were just coming from the Doctor. Her son had just got his eyesight back after being born blind. The bird flying, the sun shining and the train passing by the trees were all a sight to see for him.
The passenger upon observing the behavior of the boy was quick to come to conclusions and did not stop to consider that maybe the situation the boy was in was beyond his control.
It becomes a strong tendency of the human mind to explain the actions and behaviors of others to their traits and intentions even when the situational causes are clearly present.
When we focus on others’ behavior, we tend to assume that their behaviors and actions are reflecting their underlying traits and characteristics. We tend to ignore the situation in which the person maybe behaving the way he is.
When we form our own thoughts and opinions of a person’s actions, we tend to ignore their reasons and emotions. We blatantly hurt them with our brash opinions and words. Instead of judging them based on appearances, we should first get to know them and their story. Being a gossip-monger takes us nowhere in life.
Why feed on other people’s pain when we can help them heal? Why spread anguish when we can alleviate it? We should try to help the people in pain instead of picking on their misery. One action gone awry does not define a person. Your definition of something does not mean that it has to be the same for everyone. Everyone has different views and perspectives on life. But it doesn’t stop them from living theirs. Therefore it shouldn’t stop you from yours.
“Go beyond the obvious. Go beyond the seen. Try to look for the hidden cause to understand the person and resolve the conflicting situation you are in.”
– Gaur Gopal Das.